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Monday, December 21, 2009

Tripping to the airport

I took public transit to the airport today. It's nice that portland's
light rail goes straight to the airport's doorstep. Another nice thing
about portland's light rail is that it uses a calm, gentle voice to
notify you when the doors are closing after boarding. "The doors are
closing." Very well. Salt Lake's light rail, on the other hand, uses a
very shrill beeping sound to notify you of closing doors. And the
worst part is that they don't tune the different doors to the same
pitch, so you are left with a very dissonant, shrill sound like the
call of a bird beast from hell. I much prefer the human voice. When I
stayed in Berlin for a month, their transit system had a similar set
of pleasing voices to guide its passengers. Einsteigen, bitte. Please
board. Zurueckbleiben, bitte. Please stay back. Much more civilized
than shrill, untuned beeps.

On the train ride, I was asked to sign a petition to obtain a vote on
the ballot on legalizing marijuana. I don't sign anything I don't
research first, so I politely declined.

Then I had to listen to some crazy crack whore call everyone in her
cell phone and tell about how she had just gotten out of the clink.
Apparently she had been arrested for attempted prostitution. ("How can
you attempt a blow job?! You either do it or you don't!") and the
tragedy is that they also found her stash and she only had 20 days
left on her 3 year probation. Life's a bitch, ain't it? If I had been
feeling less ill (I have a head cold), I might have asked her to
conduct these pathetic conversations elsewhere, but I also wasn't
looking to get slapped by a crazy bitch who isn't afraid of going to
jail. So I tried to tune out her little saga.

I'm waiting to board my flight now. Once again, the flights to Salt
Lake have been severely overbooked (when will they learn?) so
hopefully I actually have a seat. If not I may be a little pissed,
cause that would mean I have to catch he train full of crazies again.

5 comments:

heidikins said...

Welcome back. Please try not to inhale.

xox

B.R. said...

Talking outloud on one's cell phone while out and about is so very vexing! Just yesterday I had the following thought as this very, VERY loud woman was talking to her Star Trek thing in her ear in close proximity to me, "I left my house to have a moment of peace and quiet to myself what makes you think I want to hear about your shopping experience as you scream about it to the world?!?"
Such lack of decorum, really. It's almost akin to some odd form of 'voyeurism', I find. It's past annoying, really!
And thanks for the SLC light rail reference. I forget that I used to ride in it. And, yes, that shrill was unbearably obnoxious. I never understood why that was necessary. It almost felt like we were being scolded for being on the train. Bizarre!

Zac said...

A good train system with pleasant accommodations (and pleasant and useful voice communication) is a real sign of civilization.

In the Bay Area I was approached at least three different times about marijuana legalization petitions. I had to say 'sorry I'm not a voter in this state, but good luck.'

Zac said...

A good train system with pleasant accommodations (and pleasant and useful voice communication) is a real sign of civilization.

In the Bay Area I was approached at least three different times about marijuana legalization petitions. I had to say 'sorry I'm not a voter in this state, but good luck.'

heidikins said...

Welcome back. Please try not to inhale.

xox

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