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Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Escaping 9 to 5 Chronicle Part 1

It’s time to escape hell.

Alright, so I’m an atheist, and thus the traditional ideas of hell don’t really mean anything to me. I don’t believe in an afterlife or the concept of an everlasting soul or essence of being. I believe in this life, here and now. To me, this is all there is.

And it is for this very reason that I feel like I am in hell. Not because I fear dying, but because I fear that I’m not living. I don’t have time to live. There’s too much work to do.

Don’t get me wrong, on the surface it seems like I don’t have anything to complain about. I make a decent wage doing an alright 9 to 5 job that allows me to live comfortably. I live in a spacious apartment with many luxuries. I have a magnificent boyfriend, whom I love and adore, and who loves and adores me back. What more could I want?

Well, I wouldn’t mind being able to enjoy it all a little more. No, let’s make that a lot more. I have all these things and no time in which to enjoy them, because during the bulk and most productive hours of my day, I’m at work. Whether there is work to do or not, I’m here.

By the time I get home to my apartment, luxuries, and boyfriend, my energy is spent, and the day is winding quickly down. But the remaining time of my day is not enough to allow me to wind down as well. Even the weekends aren’t a long enough period of time to regenerate my emotional energy. I feel drained of everything that makes me feel like me and that life is wonderful. And that, to me, is hell.

My worst nightmare (aside from being trapped in a dimly-lit cave filled with spiders), is waking up one day ten years from now and finding myself still in Salt Lake, still in a job I’m passionless about, and wondering where the decade went. Thus, I have decided that I must escape. My life depends on it. Or if not my life, my happiness, which is more important anyway.

And that is the reason for my beginning this blog, aptly titled Exodus, which will chronicle my thoughts, goals, and progress toward escaping 9 to 5 hell and reclaiming my freedom.

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